A penguin and a polar bear are sitting on an iceberg. The penguin yells, "No Soap Radio!" They both jump in the water.

Sunday, January 07, 2007

New favorite actor

Up at eight in the morning, watching Inside the Actor's Studio on YouTube when I should be working, I saw this exchange during the end bit when Lipton asks everyone the same series of questions. These are the best answers, or at least my favorite, I've heard yet.

Lipton: Johnny, what's your favorite word?
Depp: Why.
Lipton: ...What is your least favorite word?
Depp: No.
Lipton: What turns you on?
Depp: Breathing.
Lipton: What turns you off?
Depp: Not breathing?
Lipton: What sound or noise do you love?
Depp: My daughter's voice.
Lipton: What sound or noise do you hate?
Depp: Vacuum cleaner.
Lipton: What is your favorite curse word?
Depp: Boy, this is a real opportunity here.
Lipton: Yes it is.
Depp: I don't want to mess this up. I think the most expressive would be shit. Shit works a lot. . .
Lipton: . . . What profession other than yours would you like to attempt?
Depp: Writing, I think. Writing.
Lipton: What profession would you absolutely not like to try?
Depp: President of the United States.
Lipton: Johnny, if Heaven exists what would you like to hear God say when you arrive at the pearly gates?
Depp: "Wow."

During the audience question section, a Romanian student asked Depp about a period in his past where he mentioned living with Romanian gypsies. Depp said they taught him "great lessons in life. These guys really know the definition of living, you know, and I don't mean that in terms of a constant festival or a constant party, I mean these guys live every single moment, and when James asked me what I, I think it was one of my favorite things to do or something, I don't remember, but I said "breathing." We forget what a gift every single breath is, I mean, that we're given. Every breath that we take is a great gift, and we never pay respect to that, you know. And those guys, my gypsy brethren, appreciate every single second of every day, every moment, every breath they take, every...well you know the song."

I'm sold. New favorite actor. Christopher Walken just got bumped to number two, where he's still battling Denzel Washington.

The episode starts with part one here, and parts 2-5 in the side bar.


Anonymous Anonymous said...

I'm trying to think of a good joke about God being a woman if She says "Wow" when Depp goes to heaven, but I can't think of a good one, so...women like Johnny Depp. That was my point.

1/07/2007 06:04:00 PM  

Post a Comment

<< Home