A penguin and a polar bear are sitting on an iceberg. The penguin yells, "No Soap Radio!" They both jump in the water.

Tuesday, April 11, 2006

FAUX NEWS: Time-travelling cyborg infiltrates Congress, claims racism

Georgia Representative Cynthia McKinney has denied accusations that she shot and killed 17 Capitol Hill police officers after being stopped at a security checkpoint. Police officers are alleging that the congresswoman, infuriated for being stopped, glared at the officer on guard, and said only "I'll be back."

McKinney then left the checkpoint. It is at this point that police claim McKinney crashed her car into the Capitol building and through the checkpoint. She then stepped out her car, shotgun in tow, and began shooting police officers one by one, said DC Police Chief Erwin Smits.

"We couldn't stop her. Officers opened fire on her and she didn't flinch. It's like she was some sort of furious, indignant machine," said Smits.

During the attack 17 officers were killed and more than 30 were wounded. At a press conference later that day McKinney repeated her claim of innocence. "This is nothing but a case of racial profiling against a black female."

This statement brought awkward stares from the audience, who noticed that McKinney was still holding the shotgun. She put the shotgun down on the podium and continued, "I'm innocent. Anyone got a problem with that?" THE REST

The above pic was photoshopped by my friend Adam, admin of www.Kaihen.com. Damn shame we couldn't have put it in the paper, but the red eyes wouldn't have translated on the black and white page anyway.


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